SOME TOXIC HABITS TO AVOID

You've lived long enough to know that there are things that are good for you and things that are toxic for you.

You have a conscience, a brain and mind to sponsor that.

In this article, there are a few highlighted habits that are highly toxic for you.

But before unveiling it, let me explain the word TOXIC.

TOXIC is a word used to describe something that is harmful or damaging. Anything that's toxic is detrimental to you either emotionally, mentally, psychologically or physically.

Okay! So, let's get right into it.

SOME TOXIC HABITS TO AVOID

Self-Criticism

Self-criticism is evaluating and judging yourself harshly, thinking you have to be perfect and never make mistakes. It's that negative voice speaking inside of you which magnifies your weaknesses and stirs you to see nothing good about yourself and by so doing, drown you in self criticism.

That negative voice only wants you to see YOU as not good enough, a failure, a weak and unskilled person, incapable...it only points on the underdeveloped part of you. I'm intentional about using 'underdeveloped' rather than 'weakness'. Why? Because I believe that your so called weaknesses can be worked on and developed. We're are all work in progress and the aim is perfection. 

But even as that is true, don't beat yourself up if you think you're not doing it rightly. Perfection (in anything at all) is built through a process (with time and practice). So take your time and don't be in a hurry to have everything all perfect.

Another thing to note is: self criticism isn't humility. Disable that mentality if you entertain such. God won't say big things about you and expect you to believe it and walk in that light if its pride.

Speaking constantly about your weaknesses and inabilities never connotes humility. It only degrades your confidence and weaken the muscles of your mind which opens you up to feeling inferior to others. The one way to stop inferiority complex in your life is to say good things about yourself consistently. Attack DEMEANING THOUGHTS with MAGNIFYING WORDS about yourself.

Take a sheet of paper and write the things you're good at (your strengths, gifts and talents) no matter how insignificant it may seem. If that's hard for you (though I advice you do it still), ask very close friends, family or anyone around you to tell you the things they admire in you. You'll be amazed to discover that everyone is saying same thing about you. Those are your strengths. Stand upon it and run with it.

God's word can't be left out on this too. There are lots of verses of the Bible that says great things about you. God's word affords you the privilege of seeing how big, great and valuable you are through God's lens. Therefore, use it. Search for scriptures and feed on them.

Impulsivity

This literally means acting on impulse. It is doing things without thinking through the consequences involved. And this habit works with our emotions. 

A person can do something wrong almost immediately without thinking it through because of anger. Fear, another emotion can make a person make quick decisions usually to protect himself/herself from harm. Even excitement can make you act on a whim because of the rush of adrenaline.

Irrespective of the emotion you're experiencing at the moment, train yourself to stay calm in those moments in other to scrutinize your actions so it doesn't foster regrets.

When you master the art of staying calm amidst threatening situations, you'll always take right steps, make good decisions and pass sound judgements.

Envy

Envy is another habit seen in many people's lives. This habits is mostly seen in individuals who desires and wants something someone else has (success, possession, relationships, etc.)

More often that not, this attitude has stirred so much resentment, anger and bitterness in people which has led them to committing unspeakable acts.

These set of people (envious people) usually live a very unsatisfied and unhappy lives because they feel what will give them that satisfaction and happiness is with someone else.

It rubs them of peace and happiness.

I urge you to flip that attitude of the window.

If you notice any ounce of envy in you, strive to ensure it dissipates. 

One tip I'll give you is this: learn to celebrate other people. Infact, make it your lifestyle whether you feel it's necessary or not. Celebrating others for their little or big wins dissolves envy in a person's life.

When you witness what others (close or distant acquaintances) has achieved or what they own, celebrate them for it. If you go think about how you deserve it better, you'll only create a pathway for envy into your heart. Please, genuinely celebrate people both privately and publicly.

Another tip is, remain focused on your objectives and goals. Envy is a distraction. If you look at someone else's business, you'll leave yours.

Minding your business helps you stay focused and keeps you nonchalant about other people's achievement. 

Yes, it's okay to get challenged by people's wins which motivates you to double up your efforts. That's healthy! But when something negative is subtly creeping in, block it immediately and guide your heart.

 Okay?

Negativity and Complaining

I've not seen even one person who a negative mindset or attitude has helped. People with negative habit are strongly pessimistic as they see things from a negative perspective. They only see the 'bad’ in everything, 

Sadly, this is how 'complainers' are birthed. A negative person always complains about everything even the things that can to be overlooked. 

This is a habit you must avoid because it can be harmful to your mental, emotional and psychological health. It also chases people away from you. The moment a person discovers you exude bad vibes with your negative words and attitude, they'll run away from you... definitely! 

So please, try to see the silver lining in every situation, even the most difficult ones. Learn to be positive.

People loves a positive minded person. There's this optimism, cheerfulness and 'everything-will-be-alright' kind of vibe that exerts from positive people which is infectious and can be contacted. 

Their positivity in troubling or difficult situations prone them to be happy amidst the negative conditions. Learn to be positive to avoid a life of complaints. This alone can keep good relationships for you.

"Do all things without complaining and disputing that you may become blameless and harmless, children of God without fault in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world." (Philippians 2: 14-15).

I've highlighted four habits to avoid so far. There are lots of them which I'll be talking about in my upcoming vodcast. It will be available on all my social media handles once out. This vodcast is more like a continuation of this article, so be on a look out for it.

God bless you.